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By modefor, Jun 12 2019 08:58AM

We’ve all heard the term ‘Bridezilla.’


I’m so thankful that I’ve always had the best clients and never had any ‘Bridezillas.’


But I want to introduce you to another player in the wedding planning and wedding day scenario.

The ‘Mumzilla.’


One of the greatest causes of stress for couples when planning a wedding is a ‘Mumzilla,’ as this is a creature no-one will or can say ‘No’ too!


But I do say a massive ‘NO’ to the Mumzilla.


When it comes to planning a wedding, there is a role for everyone to play, even if that’s just a supporting role, but the most important thing to remember is this wedding only belongs to two people; the couple getting married.


Unfortunately, whilst sometimes it does come from a place of love and wanting to help, some Mums overstep the mark; running the show, making the decisions, controlling the guest list, deciding on the décor, choosing the canapés and even picking the dress. None of these responsibilities fall on a ‘mum’ unless it has been specifically requested or for a particular reason that the couple can’t do it themselves.


Now, I’ve actually met a few Mumzillas and I am not scared of them and have put them back in their cages, but often I see Mums swooping in and controlling the whole shebang when the couple would love nothing more than a ‘do’ in the back garden with all their mates and beer pong, but what they got was a full stately manor with white doves.


The bottom line is, if you’re a Mum, rein it in. Check in with yourself that you're not being a little OTT. This is NOT your wedding. Be supportive, be exactly what your offspring need you to be, but don’t take over the show and you certainly don’t get to dictate what and how things are done or who comes to celebrate, even if you are footing the bill. Of course, you get to make requests and have ideas and be a part of the process if that’s right, but even if you’re financially responsible, this payment does not give you the authority to hijack the whole day.


Let the couple have their day.


Help your daughter be the calm bride or son be the calm groom. Help, love and support, please do not add to the stress, strain and already present pressure that comes with planning a wedding.


Got a Mumzilla issue? Drop me a message and I’ll help you reduce the stress levels.


Much Love

Tabby xxx


#thecalmbride #theweddingfixer #createmyhappy

By modefor, Jul 2 2018 08:34AM


On Saturday the 9th of June we celebrated the wedding of Amanda and Graham at our stunning industrial wedding venue, The Arches at Dean Clough.


It was a wonderfully relaxed day for a wonderfully relaxed and happy couple. The balmy summer sunshine flooded through the windows filling The Arches wih soft light and warmth.


However, it was groom Graham's creative flair and talent that shone through on the day with his carefully designed and handcrafted photobooth, an impressive supersized Mr and Mrs sign and a beautifully designed wooden heart centre piece adorned with flowers and fairy lights which proudly displayed heart warming photographs of the bride and groom's parents on their own wedding day.

A wooden archway, also hand made by the groom provided a romantic centre piece for the ceremony itself, candlelit lanterns and simple arrangements of carefully selected pink and purple blooms added softness to the industrial feel with place cards on the tables beautifully handwritten by one of the smallest family members adding that personal touch.


As family and friends eagerly awaited elegant and relaxed bride Amanda's arrival, her four bridesmaids couldn't contain their excitement with the youngest girls wearing pretty chiffon, tutu style dresses, accessorized with sparkly shoes and magical flower wands, a creative alternative to the traditional hand held flower posies.


The relaxed vibe continued after the ceremony with a scrumptious sit down meal from the in house caterers Eat me Drink me. The sound track for the day was a super chilled and laidback play list which set the tone perfectly as guests chatted, relaxed and enjoyed each others company before dancing the night away to some fabulous music from a live, top notch band.


What a privilege it was to work with such a relaxed, happy and talented couple at my first solo wedding with Mode For....thank you!


Congratulations Mr and Mrs Ross!


Lots of Mode For love,


Karen x


For the full album of our behind the scenes pictures, click HERE



By modefor, Jun 27 2018 08:00AM

Photo (c) Capture the Love
Photo (c) Capture the Love

It’s so overwhelming…

I don’t know where to start…

Everyone has an opinion about how our wedding should be…

I just want to elope and leave everyone behind…

I’m not even looking forward to my wedding anymore…

I don’t want my family there…

I’m scared of everyone looking at me and being centre of attention…


Any of these statements ring true with you?


These are real statements I’ve heard from brides and grooms who are trying to plan their own wedding and I find it heart-breaking that anyone should feel that way (though I do like the sound and idea of a romantic elopement!).


Planning a wedding should be something that brings happiness; where you can enjoy the process as much as the end result.


The whole planning process should be filled with fun, happiness, inspiration, creativity and discovery. But I know it’s sometimes so hard to overcome the ‘overwhelm.’


Feeling overwhelmed can happen to any of us; it’s an emotion that can very easily take a grasp of us and invite its friends, anxiety, misery and even sometimes depression to the party. So, remember you’re the host of both parties… the one in your head with all your emotions and your wedding. Did you watch that movie ‘Inside Out?’ You need to choose to override ‘overwhelm.’


My advice is to take it step by step. First of all, make a point to be strong in your stance that the wedding is about you and your partner, no-one else; it should be a privilege for anyone else to be involved, not a done deal that parents, Grandparents, family of friends take control, irrespective of who is footing the bill. This is about you as a couple and you only; end of.


Decide things together as a couple; close your eyes and imagine your day, how it feels, sounds, tastes and looks and keep this visualisation strong when you’re planning. Visualise yourself at your wedding looking and feeling happy and when wedding planning starts to overwhelm take a moment to bring this visualisation to the forefront of your memory. This is a great technique for not only coping with overwhelm but deciding on elements of your special day. Don’t just rely on Pinterest and magazines, use the power of visualisation to bring your own wedding to life.


If you can bring the visualisation along with its friends creativity, excitement and happiness to the party in your head, you are going to start to love the wedding planning process.


I’ll be focussing more on controlling anxiety, nerves and overwhelm over a series of blogs and articles dedicated to the Calm Bride and in my group #theweddingfixer at www.facebook.com/groups/theweddingfixer so why not join me and share your experiences.


Much Love

Tabby xxx


AKA #theweddingfixer



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